News dontabuse is now our partner responsible for taking us down

Launch an MC server in return for your personal information

Why not create your next Minecraft server using Halex? Scroll down to see our non-existant features.

Start in more than 12 months by giving us your SSN. By signing up, you agree to our shit rules that we don't follow ourselves.

VERY HARD TO COMPREHEND PLATFORM

Get nothing done with more information being stolen

Nothing can be more shit than Halex

IDE-powered HDDs

Insanely fast dick speeds powered by low-end IDE Hard dicks.

High Security (This is a joke for legal reasons)

Extremely secure servers, isolated using air and helium!

10 Year Restarts

Why wait under 15 minutes for your server to restart when you can wait just 10 years?

0.69% Uptime

We never go up, and even if we do, we'll give you free OCX (worth around $0). Our team of professional engineers are always ready to get our services the fuck back down.

-02/0 Online

Your server will always be offine. Also, if anyone notices our timer going under -1 again pls let us know and we'll fix it

Backups

We take backups of our nodes every 24 hours to ensure no data is ever lost (Backups are stored on the same device).

Never support

We’re here to help you loose your data

Open a ticket in our Discord server and you'll get help in less than 5 years. We have many gay staff members who will be able to help you. Support is available for any stupid 12 year old Indians.